absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
