last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
