I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
