Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
