you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
