I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
