Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
