wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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