So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I want her autograph on my taint
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
jump out the window naked night went bad
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
