Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
