We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
