dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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