Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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