6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
