there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
