I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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