we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize