Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
