I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
