I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
