Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
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