so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
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