she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
