i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
