I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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