i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
