Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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