Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry lionsbeaPr hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(856): View more from New Jersey

I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more

Fav 2 884 2098
share tweet
(415): View more from California

thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.

Fav 7 4403 743
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(607): View more from New York

I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name

Fav 13 7127 1450
share tweet
(716): View more from New York

Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.

Fav 14 4815 876
share tweet
(215): View more from Pennsylvania

these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real

Fav 62 8295 1644
share tweet
(847): View more from Illinois

I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him

Fav 12 2106 3428
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(940): View more from Texas

Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.

Fav 13 4413 1080
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.

Fav 1 32 44
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(416): View more from Toronto

The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children

Fav 0 18 40
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT