bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
