Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
