Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Randomize
