when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
