My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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