My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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