there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
