i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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