Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
