I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
