Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
