I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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