The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
