it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
