real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
