I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
