1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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