You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize