You made me cry and you don't even care
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
