i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize
