But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
