There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
