TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
