areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
